Rx NURSE KRIS: Redefining the “F- Word”

“The f-word”

Not long ago, I heard a little boy being scolded by his parent for doing something each and every one of us do on a daily basis and– quite frankly– need to do.

I’m talking about that break of wind we all experience from time to time– flatulence– you may know it as that other “f-word”.  It’s a word Merriam Webster describes as “vulgar”, so– with respect to our readers, it won’t used here.  No worries, as my own children were able to supply me with a plethora of alternatives to the wildly popular “f-word”.

Let’s face it, flatulence can be funny

I remember the first time I ever broke wind in front of my boyfriend.  It just happened without warning.  Of course it did.  As a Domestic Square Peg, it was bound to happen sooner– rather than later.

Up ’til then, I had been the Ft. Knox of fluffs.  I found ways to race to another room, quickly take a bathroom break or– worse yet, hold it in– ugh!

Since passing gas that memorable and enlightening day, that boyfriend is now my husband and neither of us feels shame for allowing our bodies to do what they’re supposed to do. We even laugh about it, because c’mon,  breaking wind IS often pretty darn hilarious! Face it.  Flatulence can be FUNNY!  In fact, as far back as the middle ages even the Father of English literature, Geoffrey Chaucer was having a little fun with  flatulence.

toot is simply a mixture of gases in your intestine that are created during digestion that sooner or later gotta come out.  Since it’s normal to toot 6-20 times a day, holding it in could land you one whopper of a bellyache.  It’s normal and healthy


Ironically, that first fluff in front of my husband set him free.  Every other relationship he’d been in, the woman would walk away in disgust if there was even the mere mention of someone tooting (like THEY never did it!).  That’s tough for a fella since they’d rather celebrate flatulence than fake hiding it.

Granted– I am a nurse, so it takes a lot to turn me off, but we all can learn a lesson from passing gas, tooting, cutting the cheese– whatever you call it–  I do it, you do it, the dog does it, heck– Justin Bieber does it and it’s NORMAL!  

So why is tooting so taboo, especially for women?!


Men take pride in presenting the best passing of gas.  Kids think cutting the cheese is cool, so is poop! There are even popular children’s book to educate kids: “The Gas We Pass” , “Everyone Poops” and a series of books called “Walter the Farting Dog”.  Oprah had Dr. Oz tell us we should all be sure to take a peek at our poop to make sure it’s the right shape (like an “S”) and color (brown or green is good). He even goes so far as to tell us how it should sound when it hits the water in the toilet (by the way, a swoosh is preferred over a plop).

So, again I ask– other than making sure we don’t offend with the odor– what’s wrong with passing gas?

The answer?   NOTHING.

The prescription?  Look at your poop and break wind with abandon!

Take the “ewwww” factor out of learning about your body.  This will help you to stay healthy and it’s likely to make you laugh a little, too!

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2 Responses to Rx NURSE KRIS: Redefining the “F- Word”

  1. Count Raoul says:

    Thank you Nurse Kris…. the seal is broken, the genie has escaped. Thank you, again.

    My personal favorite vaudeville performer was a Parisian known as La Patomane. Watch a short video to decide how famous you could one day become…

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=evwLzR57wsc

  2. Annie says:

    Toots always have resulted in lots of laughter in our family of 3 girls! Our family’s special euphemism for a very audible passing of gas is “the frogs escaped!”

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